The Road Not Taken...

Otherwise known as The Chapter Yet Unwritten...

I facilitated a parent-teacher conference after school today, which is not uncommon on Mondays, Tuesdays, and Thursdays.  At 3:15, I looked down at my watch.  The conference had pretty much wrapped up, but the parent and child were... lingering.  When I looked up, I explained to the mother, I have an appointment at 3:30.  She took her cue, and departed with my student.  The conference had served its purpose, and everybody was happy. 

I didn't tell the mother what my appointment was for... No one else needed to know that I was meeting one of my oldest friends, Robin, for a cupcake, coffee, and communion at the Sugar Magnolia, a cute little cupcake cafe on State of the Steelers Avenue in My Small Town's up and coming downtown area.  It wasn't a secret; and it was well-past my contract time... but still... 3:30 is a bit early to leave work.  My usual departure time is about four.  I made an exception for Robin.  She had suggested the 3:30 meeting time, and to be honest, I couldn't wait. 

Robin and I have been friends since I moved to My Small Town in sixth grade, and we tend to go through long periods of time where we don't see each other much outside of Facebook.  I get busy with my singlehood, she gets even more busy with her parenthood-- a 17 year-old young man, two adorable girls under the age of eight... and her mother.  What I went through with my parents in the past year is nothing compared to what Robin is doing.  Her mother is in the final stages of dementia.  Robin is bravely blogging about her experiences in Finding Patience, and has given of herself in every way to care for her mother.  I admire her spirit, her heart, her courage.  She is the embodiment of a daughter's love for her mother.  And I'm not just saying that because I've known her for 25 years.  (But it might be part of the reason.)

Robin and I ordered Very Vanilla and Crazy Good Chocolate Cupcakes, respectfully, along with hot delicious beverages to sip as we sinned.  (Yes... AGAIN!  It's my birthday week!  What do you want from me?!)  Robin had chai, and I drank ordinary coffee with milk. 

We sat down, and started talking.  And we talked.  And talked.  And talked some MORE.  It was... wonderful.  We talked about my job, the blog, single adventures, and Robin told me about her family, and her recent return to higher education.  She had a baby during her freshman year of college.  A baby who is now a senior at My Small Town High School, and cringes every time I am giving a presentation and I tell the class a little too exuberantly that I saw him the day he was born. 

It still amazes me that that little tiny baby is now a senior.  A senior who ducks when he sees me in the hall because he hates when I tell whoever will listen that I met him the day he was born.  About a decade later, Robin met her wonderful, sweet, handy husband, and had her two little girls.  When we spend time together we are both very aware that we took two completely different paths.  I envy her family life, just a little bit, and she envies my single life, just a little bit. 

We love each other, and are happy for each other, at the end of our afternoon together today, made plans to do it again next month.  I have learned that if I don't make a plan, the meeting doesn't happen.  I put the engagement into my phone, and she told me to remind her.  She can be sure that I will.

It took me a long time to be comfortable with my never-married single status.  Seeing Robin and hearing about her family tugs at my heartstrings just a bit, reminding me of the road not taken in my life.  At least.... not taken yet.  That chapter's not yet written.... and I'm okay with that.